Posts from the Derek’s Reality Category

20160127_130118Found a donut flattened in a napkin in the supplies pouch of a seventh grader’s binder minutes after the bell.

Spent most of third period huddled against the west wall of my classroom with thirty students until admins were sure the man in the green puffy jacket who stumbled across our schoolyard with a gun meant us no harm.

By sixth period I was too low on patience to mediate a conflict with the co-ed quartet of Study Skills students poking each other with pencils with sparkly jelly grips and arguing over a glue stick.

I walked over and held out my hand.

The note in the glue container read, “TRUTH: If you HAD to French kiss Jason or Jesús, who would you pick and why?”

Middle school. (more…)

Tall Timber Ranch leafAfter my group of 12- and 13-year-old middle school students lined the riverbank with foraged materials arranged in Andy-Goldsworthy inspired patterns, they walked back to camp. Preoccupied with my ongoing roadside search for a leaf to flatten in a book, I didn’t hear everything they said. A couple of them talked about the inability of cameras to capture fall colors. Hugo walked alongside me. “What are you doing?” he asked.

“I’m looking for a perfect leaf,” I said, pulling on a low branch.

“What do you mean? Isn’t everyone’s definition of perfect different?” he asked.

School’s been in session long enough for me to know Hugo knows things I don’t know, like swing dance moves and the history of yoga’s religious roots, so I hesitated. (more…)

Just kidding.

A girl “dislocated” her jaw on a cheeseburger, but everything else on the field trip was fine. The kids toured campus and listened to a college lecture. No one cried.

I got here because after a few months of exploring Central America and contemplating my future in education, I scored a two-month job teaching Shakespeare’s “The Taming of the Shrew” to 11- and 12-year-olds in Renton, Wash. We had a few weeks until we started the play about a woman who finds happiness by being obedient to the man who deprives her of food and sleep – why a curriculum writer would find this “comedy” suitable for sixth graders, I didn’t know – so we had time for things like building college dreams and getting to know each other.

“Are you chewing gum?” a girl with a purple butterfly clip in her hair asked me on the first day.

“Why?” I asked.

“We can chew gum?”

“Ummm…” I swallowed.

“Can I go to my locker and get a book?” a boy in a DEPT OF PURE GENIUS shirt asked on the second day.

“Run quick,” I said.

“We’re allowed to run?”

All accidental revolutions considered, I started paying attention to the basic rules of the middle school handbook and to the quirky characteristics of my sixth graders who, like lots of other sixth graders, love folding notebook paper into footballs, fortune-tellers, ninja stars, and inflatable sweet rice dumplings. (more…)

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Last night I wasn’t sure if I’d have work today, so I was happy to see your absence in the online substitute register. I couldn’t find the lesson plan anywhere, so your students played volleyball and basketball.

In first period, a girl with dishwater hair didn’t care to serve, but when she reached back and went for a basic underhand the ball cleared the net, reminding me that serving a volleyball is no small thing, especially with onlookers, and that some days it’s best to take the form that gets results.

Your students in second period told me you’ve been recovering from back surgery, and that they knocked out their first sub. “What?” I asked. “Knocked out?” The kid got suspended, they explained, for hitting the substitute lady in the head with a volleyball, and the other two kids who aimed but missed stuck around and got into new kinds of mischief, like rolling free weights down the stairs. That’s why second period now walks laps instead of playing games, they said. (more…)

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Here’s the beginning of my memoir, Magical Teaching: Nuanced Conversations About Big Ideas, Witty Banter in the Hallways, and Other Fantasies of a Rookie Teacher.


Here is a headless, hand-less, foot-less English teacher purchased from Target. I stare at the brown khakis and white shirt on my bed and wonder how I, accustomed to flannel pajama pants and sweatshirts, will wear the outfit.

I’m here because I stuttered as a child and fell in love with books as a way to avoid interacting with my peers. In fourth grade the teacher put my name on the board for reading No Coins, Please when I should have been working on my multiplication tables. When I cracked the book to find out how many New Yorkers Artie could swindle into buying jars of grape jelly labeled “Attack Jelly” (intended to defend against home invaders the likes of which run rampant in urban jungles like New York City), Mr. Segur forced me to skip recess and stay inside, as if gleaning tips from an entrepreneur like Artie in an air-conditioned teacher-supervised space would deter me from reading in the future. (more…)

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On Wednesday I’ll share the first chapter of my memoir Magical Teaching: Nuanced Conversations About Big Ideas, Witty Banter in the Hallways, and Other Fantasies of a Rookie Teacher. Details below.

Mr. Smith is not your average teacher. He smokes cigarettes confiscated from students, serves fresh tea to a perpetually tardy boy, and when a young woman catches him wearing pajamas and reading “Rolling Stone” in Target, that becomes the topic for class discussion the next day.

Welcome to Derek Smith’s journal of his first year teaching English at a public high school. With relentless momentum and self-effacing honesty, Magical Teaching: Nuanced Conversations About Big Ideas, Witty Banter in the Hallways, and Other Fantasies of a Rookie Teacher tells a hilarious and touching tale that romps though the education of one young man and 120 first-years in a run-down portable on the edge of campus. Smith, whose life is as fragmented and frantic as his students, skips and trips through a year in which he confronts sly-eyed rats, leaky ceiling tiles, misbehaving students, negative colleagues, and one outlandish principal – predictable obstacles for a first-year teacher, he knows.

Chronicling both the sweep of American education and small successes of life and learning, Magical Teaching puts breath and bones on one of our nearly universal experiences: high school. LouAnne Johnson, bestselling author of “Dangerous Minds,” writes that Smith “has the soul of a poet and the wit of a stand-up comic.” Bret Lott, bestselling author of “Jewel,” calls Magical Teaching “a sharp and funny and brutally honest book that has at its core a kind of shape-shifting elegance—it is at once a terror-ride through that first year of teaching and a nuanced homage… the result is a beautiful and funny story.”

Recent second-order changes to the manuscript include a heightened focus on narrative momentum and a reduction in length from 76,000 words to 49,000 words. A more formal proposal – including information about primary and secondary markets, chapter summaries, competitive works, and endorsements – is available.

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On the phone with an admin at a Utah high school, recommending my student teacher for a job / complimenting his work with our diverse population, and the admin asks, “At a low-income school? How is he with rigor? Our school is high-achieving…”


I understand. Our sophomores and juniors take the PSAT and SAT for free. Our talent show sells out. Our culinary students provide hors d’oeuvres for the Seattle International Film Festival, our student journalists produce professional publications, and our choir writes original compositions for graduation. Next week our annual multicultural mash-up takes over. Wanna come? Our students hold doors for visitors, so they’ll definitely hold one for you. You and I can go to ping-pong or anime club after school, and track practice some time after that. We’ll sit on the bleachers and watch our 4 x 400 m sprinters run circles around your racist logic…


Letter to student teacher

We’re far enough into the year to see the end of student teaching for you, but can I say? I continue to struggle. I feel at war with fourth period. So many students in fourth period have problems from the news: illiteracy, apathy, goldfish memories, hummingbird focus… I asked to see Yourhigness’ assignment the other day, but he wouldn’t show me the paper. At first he was preoccupied eating a carton of macaroni salad and egg rolls over the corner garbage can, but when he got to his seat he still wouldn’t show me. He covered the paper with his arms. “Part of my job is to monitor your writing,” I said. He held the paper up and said, “I’ll read it out loud.” After two or three sentences of reading, he looked me in the eye and kept talking as if the words on the page had slid off the edge and were dangling in the air between us. “Are you reading?” I interrupted. “Yeah,” he said, “I’m reading.”

I’m writing from a Saturday class I have to take to keep my Career & Technical Education Certificate. (Journalism is cross-credited so I need both CTE and English endorsements.) I’m trying to pay attention to the instructor but keep thinking about the students we share, especially Yourhighness and Cordonte. I love that you took time during 4th period to talk one-on-one with Yourhighness and answer his questions about college: where you went, how to get in, the cost. Forging relationships like this will make your teaching more powerful and our students’ learning more meaningful, and I guess that’s what I’m trying to do here: spend some time focusing on what you want to know.

My teacher just said, “Sometimes I think I should go back to teaching high school and relax.” Ha! After he told us about a Hawaiian vacation. Other than this once-a-month class, what else is he doing? Lugging elk meat through the North Cascades? I’m 20% of the students here. It’s Saturday. How did I get in The Breakfast Club?

Anyway, onto your questions—starting with the easiest and ending with the hardest.


Letter to student teacher
What are some of the best methods for communicating with parents? What are some good ways for a teacher to relate to students and develop camaraderie? What do teachers gain from professional development?

A new teacher I know asked these questions. Tomorrow on Magical Teaching, I answer them honestly.


Karen Adams Severe, my Uncle Ron’s first wife, embroidered this crewel. My mom kept it displayed throughout our house growing up, and I keep it above the whiteboard in my classroom now. Every time I see it, I think of a few lines from a great Susan Kinsolving poem: “Trust that thirty thousand sword- / fish will never near a ship, that far / from cameras or cars elephant herds live / long elephant lives.”

When I moved into the classroom I’m in now, I found boxes of handouts with prescriptive instructions for writing essays: this essay should have a certain number of paragraphs, and each paragraph should have a certain number of sentences, and each sentence should sound exactly this particular way. No room for creativity or growth. Where were the wild animals in windy canyons? Must we tag every sentient being, every sentence?

Over the last five years I’ve come to understand how students who do not know how to think coherently can benefit from handouts like these: some people learning to build coherent thoughts by working inside someone else’s scaffolding. The teacher provides the pieces and the student assembles them. I try to remember it shouldn’t all be construction. Sometimes growth happens in the wild, and to love something is to give it room enough to grow.

(Derek Smith)